Jack Spratt

120728 22:14 meaning

I see so deeply within myself.
Not needing my eyes, I can see everything clearly.
Why would I want to bother my eyes again
Now that I see the world through His eyes? --Rumi

The problem of my photographic career soon announced itself in the nascent days and months of working as photojournalist. Initially my vision/version of things was informed by a need to see things in an 'artistic, musical or sculptural' way. Meaning I had a preconceived set of notions into which I framed the action before me. Frame in this photographic case is significant since we as still photographer capture life within a single still frame excluding all else. And in the days of chemical versus digital there were no proofs until the entire process was completed. Pass/Fail

The shift became apparent soon after realizing that truth is stranger than fiction: my preconceived ideation advancing not the object/subject before me but my ego. Greedy for acknowledgement that I was worth attention or at least some small affirmation that I had value. I can be a vicious and rude person a defect I bridle with difficulty. Humility arose in the recognition that there was before me a truth I was employed to record. Thus the essence of my philosophy of truth became to be neutral and see what happened.

My initial intention was to write about what Rumi said " . . see the world though His eyes?" In once sense, to me profoundly so, he speaks of the concept and meaning of 'God.' Though in writing the previous sentence I recalled: 1 Corinthians 13, in which a mirror is mentioned coupled with the seeing of a child becoming fully mature. Without boast I've had many "Zen" moments the epiphany of being one thing exiting as another being. Simultaneously given my experience of such prior moment definitude knowing I "had it in the can, that's a wrap" I could quit the chaos and go home my assignment competed.

I fell blind when Randy, my son, was diagnosed and intuitively I knew he was to die. A witness to his sister's birth and obvious to me death soon arriving thereafter . . . about which I could not impose or inflict upon her mother . . . remaining silent. Brief aside I in old age know that forever have I treated women as God/Goddess based upon my lifelong estrangement from women. I was and remain a persistent little bastard and curious to boot. In my own way I skated through Johanna's birth brief life and death in custodial care; she had no brain beyond a wafer thin tissue lining her skull.

Whether recording light falling upon a child skipping rope or the numinous; there are two consciousness' observing one another and as Jung famously said that which sees is altered by the seen. Of the several attempts at a short story or novel I became conscious that the effort created characters who in turn created significant influence upon me attempting to depict their activities advancing the story line.

I am fascinated by warriors of the oriental military arts and use, for my own sense of what I'd do if confronted with threat or harm -- a relatively common experience since with a camera in hand I am savage -- a personal conviction that barking dogs are not my problem but the silent ones are.

Intellect is admirable but the other three functions desirable when confronted with death or God.

That is my summation of admiration for Rumi since he knew better God in real life than has ever been articulated via any other source of communication I know of. Inappropriate but I will confess I learned early on that the cartoon or graphic novel rendering of the Bible gave me a deeper sense then the reading of it. The process of my education is eclectic and various to a ridiculous extent.

This, what I've written is not about me, but you becoming we conscious, mindful and fearless in the this now chaos.

Curiosity is a form of greed but unlike addiction; unfulfilled; a vast emptiness it can be fulfilled as is obvious to me via Rumi's poetry. There is only one God known by various names and definitions knowable only when face to face. All institutions begin with an epiphany then die by attrition the greed of the administrators to protect the truth fixed and immutable. God is, to me very mutable and fluid, a comedian and dancer.

You can know and own everything material but if you do not know your soul you have nothing and fear the loss of that.


PS 120729 05:28

Upon arising I fell to wondering abut what I wrote above and looking at the environment of this new day yet to arise saw:

"I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong." --Abraham Lincoln

He is the first I understood as utterly self derived by educating himself and being what he was & remains; glorious.

The He of Rumi's reference is the final Judge of souls measured by things and those who in giving grow evermore to spill out the love received.

Amen

© 2012 by Jack Spratt All Rights Reserved