120621
04:47 Serene never indifferent
I
am neither profound nor profane but somewhere either between or
utterly other or merely myself as infantile and equally ancient more
nearly of or as God whom I dearly clearly willfully more nearly would
love as always more and other than my self.
as
I play with myself prayerfully as in a sandbox filled with building
blocks lettered laughing out loud the conjunctions and configurations
random that spell love a word whose meaning can be defined in
manifold ways to suit the utterer
irreverent
superfluous scandalous I regard all others especially those radically
different from myself as equally grand and divine as defined in
Eden's garden wherein being the southern area of Africa no whities
need apply creation begun they were most assuredly have been black
while I am white and by this I see God Adam & Eve & of course
the Snake all black so I am irrelevant or at the very least lesser
somehow in the darkness of history
Thus
or so it must not in conjecture have been Jesus naked as the day he
was born crucified in the end sans diaper voiding and excreting
himself as I would will when I die when born yet again or merely once
I cling to his horny nailed cold dead feet weeping then as now in
terminal grief His leaving me motley Chameleon becoming all the
colors of the cosmos merging heaven with hell is not birth life death
one continuity no part to be despised while He of course remains
Something Else a womanly man all faculties equally combined a paean
to Reinhold Niebuhr's Serenity
Prayer with a nod to St. Francis in a tutu.
I can change nothing but
myself yet would argue the right to ask or tell the words “God,
grant me” to “God thank you for” the serenity. . . .Amen in
these final days of my self and us and all things created large and
small following thee more nearly now once celebrated now mourned have
You forsaken us? Me thinks we forsake ourselves.
Why
oh why can you see me now apologetic and fecal minded as those who
purport to serve us scatocephalic the politicians stupefaction of all
parties concerned is astonishing What was once noble in conception
has become merely dominance by the few of the many Yet true of all
institutions from revolutions inevitable death ensues the stewards
become fools in their vanity pretending to be God among men the
vortex of vanity a maelstrom of greed selfishness grown gigantic The
only divine right is life itself and free will to become whole if not
holy I am a man weeping become beware of me the patience of a parent
whose child died uselessly either from chance choice or disease . . .
once whole returned in pieces or never more to be seen at the behest
of idealogues My intention is evolutionary not revolution but
becoming ever clearer Knowing your vanity will eventually slay you
not me.
Be
well and pursue your Self to its inevitable end redeemed or forever
damned not by me since I stand foolish before the same Judge as you
All are equally beloved and in choice must accept the accountancy
Karma is choice not chance
