. . . for now, for awhile, short or long I'll continue to privately/publicly write myself in black ink across the night sky

A student of death from an early age I did not recognize my product in any venue a suicide note overly long, embellished with flourishes. Explicit in birth is death. All life, even love, dies. All beginnings hold their own endings in time.

I have no idea of when I will die by either choice or chance. Recent events conjoined lend a sense of my end nearer now.

Slithering sibilantly announced by the suns wobbling course across the saw tooth sun dial of the Organ Mountains from my front porch briefly stilled at summer solstice and then the longest night at winter solstice. Apogee and nadir.

I've always loved the light dying into night and the events I allude to deal as much with her as me. For a long time since we first met the dawn was first hers then mine then ours and soon it seems will be for one or the other whoever remains to see the fire sky.

It began with her definition of friendship growing into being confidants . . . breast cancer or merely tumors? Her dance card and overlay to my recent encounter with wanting or not wanting to go on coupled with the facts seem without sentimentality. Periodically we address our presence on Facebook and bemoan the tidal wave of self advertisement. Each knowing we exist and why for now we address each pain as it attacks.

The earth sustained our species for millions of years and now it seems can no longer do so while we reproduce in ever increasing numbers. Already a 1/3 over capacity there is no future for us, at least none without enormous profit to those who figure it out; our sustenance and ability to survive the crowd.

I don't like crowds, hoards or hoarders.

Last things, cars, homes, love affairs, child or children well and gone on to play tag with others the pretense of life lived or survived.

To 'my' Facebook "friends" should you ever seek me I've relocated here.

. . . for now, for awhile, short or long I'll continue to privately/publicly write myself in black ink across the night sky

120826 0230 suicide note
© 2012 by Jack Spratt All Rights Reserved